Oh Brother Squirrel
We are one – your tail, my hair
Now I must eat you.
Sitting on toilet
Pellet gun propped on the sill
And, for the 4th of July …..
Short, for such is life
Long, for freedom has no bounds
———– and some new ones:
Shadows of pine trees
Scraping the trailer’s shadow
Mullet in morning
Wind off the truck hood
Nuh’thin blows me like she done
Truck parts in the tub
Shut up, you worthless dang dog!
Fix me a pot pie.
Pops a Meister Brau
Adjust the damn rabbit ears
Free hand goes in shorts
I am sitting here
Just watching the nascar show
Ooo, there goes some beer
Denim rebel yell
Carry on my wayward son!
Care for a Bud Light?
Apparently we’re not so tired of mullet haiku or other kinds, either. Mair and I wrote email comments back and forth yesterday in the form of haiku.
It’s a gift.
Here’s some more mullet haiku from beerchurch or whatever the hell it was:
Hairdo says something
Only the best for me, friend
Another Schmidt, please
Her new cuttin shears
Mama ain’t cut hair before
A knack for mullets
Beer and smokes, passenger side
Wife and kids, back seat
Brother went to war
I bought an old camaro
We live for freedom!
Daring styled mane
With darkly tinted glasses
NO ONE stops me now!
Lord Brougham, the nineteenth century British statesman, was irked by his son’s romance with a French actress. He wrote to him, “If you do not quit her, I will stop your allowance.” His son promptly replied, “If you do not double it, I will marry her.”
“Absence is to love what wind is to a fire; it puts out the little, it kindles the great.”
—ROGER, COMTE DE BUSSY-RABUTIN, AMOROUS HISTORY OF GAUL
Idaho didn’t kill me. Being in a one room Holiday Express “suite” with Bob and Andrew both for 5 days nearly did, though. Geez, what were we thinking? Men are sooooo stinky. I am admittedly spoiled at home by having my *own* bathroom.
Anyway, the wedding was very nice, had lots of youthful spirit, embodied by tuxedos worn with thongs (the footwear kind, although there were doubtless plenty of the others, too), many piercings and tattoos and new age music. And a guy that played the bagpipes. And a guy on 6 ft stilts. And great beer on tap! Possibly the nicest touch was their old dog, Bill, acting as ring bearer. He did a good job. 🙂
If you want to see some pictures (sans captions, I’m afraid), here they are:
We are embarking on a journey to Idaho in the morning. My very first niece, Amanda, is getting married in Boise on Saturday.
It’s been a trip getting ready for this. The worst part so far has been fighting with my Garmin GPS. God but that software is annoying! I’m really, really good with software and I have a devil of a time trying to make it work.
After the death of her actor husband, English stage actress Sybil Thorndike was asked about their long and presumably happy marriage: “Did you ever think of divorce?” “Divorce?” she replied. “Never. But murder, often.”
A man has only one escape from his old self: to see a different self in the mirror of some woman’s eyes.”
—JOURNALIST/PLAYWRIGHT CLARE BOOTHE LUCE
Here’s a new one.
Not once, but TWICE tonight, I’ve looked down and Sebastian (the retarded, deaf, one-eyed cocker spaniel that once belonged to my husband’s ex) was eating …. money. He has ingested the corner of one 1$ bill, and half of another. He was getting set to work on a $5 bill when I caught him again.
What is bugging me most about this is I have no idea where he got it! The last time I looked down, he had a wad of bills near his foot.
I’ve confiscated them.
This sounds easy — Here’s how:
The object is to insert the numbers in the boxes to satisfy only one condition: each row, column and 3×3 box must contain the digits 1 through 9 exactly once. What could be simpler?
Credit where Credit is Due:
This came with yesterday’s Club Top 5 list from Chris White, in his Too Much Fun links of the day.