Spam Haiku

This would be the “meat” kind, not the mail kind …..

.
.
Ears, snouts and innards
A homogeneous mass
Pass another slice
.
.
Cube of cold pinkness
Yellow specks of porcine fat
Give me a spork please
.
.
.
Old man seeks doctor
“I eat spam daily” he says,
Angioplasty
.
.

Highly unnatural
The tortured shape of this “food”
A small pink coffin
.
.

This haiku came from John’s Shrine to Spam, which apparently doesn’t exist anymore.

Mullet Haiku

Well, I’ve been trying to quit, don’t ya know, but couldn’t resist the call of the mullet. Call me a mulletard.

That reminds me, one of the blogs I’ve been reading is by a woman who calls people she doesn’t like Fucktards.

I like it. A lot!
It’s so descriptive. By golly, you never have to wonder where she stands on anything.

And now, freshly lifted from BeerChurch archives ….
It’s Mullet Haiku!
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.
.
.
.

Empty Stroh’s beer cans
Oxycontin on the brain
Wonders why no job
.
.
.
.

Tug on the mullet
Cousin’s thumb is in my bum
Honeymoon heaven
.

mulletard (see, I stole this)

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.
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Afternoon at home
Jerry Springer show inspires
Viewers, guests the same
.
.
Chet
.
Chet had several good ones in there, he is no doubt frittering his talent away on silly time-wasting things like mullet Haiku.
.
.
What? Me? Shaddup.

.
.
.

i have to study
but the mullet compels me
to write more haikus

david a
[this one is totally in the spirit, don’t you think?]
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.
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Bitchin’ Camaro <——– that's me
Foghat on Blaupunkt Speakers
Cops Snatched My Sweet-Leaf

Freddy (NotFer)Proffit
.
.
.
.

Shoot those bowling pins!
Anything for a good time
Fish with T-N-T

david
.
.
.
.

Hair gel too costly
My mother has a mullet
Therapy? You bet!

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.
.
.
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Mullet head poet
Bikini, lawn chair web marks
Six-pack for dinner
.

katie sue
.
.
.
.
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My car cost more
Than my home on wheels
Heh, beat that, man!
.
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Pink Bird Freak
.
.
.

Unconscious Mutterings

Unconscious Mutterings
Week 143

Here, you try ’em before you look at what I said.

I say … and you think … ?
1. Unbreakable::
2. Have mercy::
3. Do it better::
4. Settle scores::
5. Comments::
6. Craziest thing::
7. Apple::
8. Halloween::
9. Manageable::
10. Trick::

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.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.

Mine

1. Unbreakable:: heart
2. Have mercy:: on my soul
3. Do it better:: Do it faster
4. Settle scores:: even
5. Comments:: no comment
6. Craziest thing:: Sissy The Dog
7. Apple:: crisp
8. Halloween:: cold
9. Manageable:: hair
10. Trick:: or Treat, of course.
These strike me as kind of dumb today. Could just be me, however.

Who’s Next?

From TheOnion.com:
Bush To Nominate Next Person Who Walks Through Door

October 27, 2005 | Issue 41•43

WASHINGTON, DC—After Harriet Miers withdrew her nomination for the Supreme Court Thursday, President Bush announced that he will nominate the next person who walks through his door. “I assure the American people that the next person who enters my field of vision will be a highly qualified candidate of unimpeachable character, with a solid record, and—what’s more—a good heart,” Bush said. As of press time, 17 people were waiting outside the door, including the president’s daughter Jenna, and special prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald.

BuzzWord

B U Z Z W O R D O F T H E D A Y

splog: A fake blog created by spammers as a
home for their ads and scams. Of the 7,000 new blogs
started each day, nearly 10% are now splogs. (Sorry,
there’s nothing humorous about this one.)

To see the full Buzzword Compliant
Dictionary, just click here.
http://www.buzzwhack.com

About Blogging

From Dilbert’s newsletter to his loyal DNRC:

People who are trying to decide whether to create a blog or not go through a thought process much like this:

1. The world sure needs more of ME.
2. Maybe I’ll shout more often so that people nearby can experience the joy of knowing my thoughts.
3. No, wait, shouting looks too crazy.
4. I know – I’ll write down my daily thoughts and badger people to read them.
5. If only there was a description for this process that doesn’t involve the words egomaniac or unnecessary.
6. What? It’s called a blog? I’m there!

The blogger’s philosophy goes something like this:

Everything that I think about is more fascinating than the crap in your head.

The beauty of blogging, as compared to writing a book, is that no editor will be interfering with my random spelling and grammar, my complete disregard for the facts, and my wandering sentences that seem to go on and on and never end so that you feel like you need to take a breath and clear your head before you can even consider making it to the end of the sentence that probably didn’t need to be written anyhoo.

If that doesn’t inspire you to read my blog, I don’t know what will. You can find the Dilbert Blog at

http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/

Interdisciplinary Conference on Gender, Technology, and ICT Workplace

The WINIT International and Interdisciplinary Conference on Gender,
Technology and the ICT Workplace
Information Systems Institute (ISI), University of Salford, Greater
Manchester, UK
Tuesday 21st March 2006
Further details on the conference website:
http://www.winit-salford.com/conference/

Call for Papers

The under-representation of female ICT workers remains a source of frustration for all concerned with gender issues in relation to contemporary workplaces, and in relation to ‘new’ technologies. The male
dominance (in both statistical and symbolic terms) of ICT workplaces continues to have immediate and wider consequences. In immediate terms, those few women who do enter the ICT workplace may have to contend with direct and indirect discrimination, issues of gender identity and isolation (Richardson et al 2005), working patterns which impact unfairly on women (Kodz et al 2002, Platman and Taylor 2004), and
barriers to career progression (Liff and Ward 2001). Despite many initiatives over the last thirty years, women are still not entering the ICT industry in significant numbers. Even fewer have managed to reach
the higher echelons of the profession. Indeed female ICT professionals are leaving the industry in disproportionate numbers (IBM 2003). In a wider sense, the fact that women have practically no voice in the
creation of the major technological innovations currently being interweaved into our lives must be to the detriment of the industry, to society as a whole (Selby and Young 1997) and to women themselves
(Faulkner 2004).
To continue and extend dialogue on these concerns, the Women in Information Technology (WINIT) team present a one day international and interdisciplinary conference based at the University of Salford, UK.
Papers are invited from academics and practitioners looking at the under-representation of women in the ICT industry, including structural and cultural issues, the characteristics of ICT workplaces though a
gender lens, and gender/ICT relations. PhD students and early-stage researchers are welcome. Papers may be either long (up to 7000 words, 20 minutes presentation) or short (up to 3000 words, 10 minutes
presentation). Lively discussions/debates will be encouraged throughout the day. Papers are encouraged, but not restricted to, the following themes:

• Gender & ICT workplace cultures

• Gender & ICT working practices (flexible working, work-life balance, mentoring etc)

• Gendered identity/subjectivity in relation to ICT/ICT workplace

• Gender & ICT: Narratives, accounts and stories

• Gender & technology relations

• Comparative/‘global’ studies of gender & ICT

• The ICT workplace: gender & best practices

• Feminist epistemologies & methodologies

• Gender & ICT: the future?

Regards

Marie Griffiths

The WINIT International and Interdisciplinary Conference on
Gender, Technology and the ICT Workplace
Tuesday 21st March 2006
http://www.winit-salford.com/conference

Institute of InformationSystems

Room 502

Maxwell Building

University of Salford

M5 4WT

0161 295 4237

==================================================

Web Site: http://www.isi.salford.ac.uk/gris/winit/index.html

Can you help!! If you are a woman in IT could you please complete our
questionnaire, just click on the link below.

http://www.winit-salford.com/WinitSurvey//TakeSurvey.asp?SurveyID=943963K1383LG