Haiku: Winter

Ashley, one of the Haiku authors, is moving to Tahoe. Silly girl.
Been there, done that, have lots of advice, mostly about driving ….

And so, with no Further Ado, it’s

WINTER HAIKU

Mair’s contribution:

Rain, so much better.
You think the 405 sucks?
Nothing like the snow!

Lesson number one,
Beth and I raised in Snowville,
Pump the brakes, baby.

HUGE change in drive style.
Must drive very slowly now.
Snow bank, here I come!

Warm and toasty bed,
It’s a white, white world outside,
Why should I get up?

The floor is soooo cold,
My bed was soooo very warm,
Call in sick again?

——————————————
Ashley chimes in:
Big black dog digging,
White blanket covers the ground,
She’s never seen snow.
🙂

Brand new ice scraper,
Brand spankin’ new studded tires,
Ashley scared s***less

24 inches,
24 hour blizzard,
Not leaving the house.

——————————————-
And I Get The Last Word:

Leaving the driveway
Six feet of snow in the way
Get out the shovel.

Look at the new snow!
So beautiful and pristine!
Get out the shovel.

Want to go to work?
Better start really early.
Get out the shovel.

Harrah’s to the “Y”?
Hope you are not late.
Tourists bumper to bumper.

Steer into the skid
Getting high-centered can suck.
Brakes are not your friend.

Easy to get stuck
Always take kitty litter
Traction in a bag!

Using a light touch
Brakes or accelerator
Often saves the day

First rule of Tahoe:
Beware San Jose drivers
They always panic.

Hunting Season

A man and his friend were hunting deer in northern Wisconsin near a blacktop highway. A huge buck walked by and the hunter carefully raised his rifle and took careful aim. Before he could pull the trigger , his friend alerted him to a funeral procession passing on the road below their stand.

The hunter slowly lowered his 30-06 deer rifle, took off his hat, bowed his head and closed his eyes in prayer.

His friend was amazed. “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are the kindest man I have ever known.”

The hunter shrugged. “Yeah, well, we were married for 32 years.”

On Being Helpful

I was whining to the old man this morning about not having any strength in my hands.

He offered to let me rub his back more to build up the muscles in my fingers. Wasn’t that nice of him? 🙂

Wide Load

That’s what I should have named this picture of our lovely cat under the freshly installed Christmas tree. Scuff is 13.5 pounds of Fat Kitty Bliss and Attitude. Her nickname is The Bowling Ball when she decides to sleep on (yes, on, not near) us at 3 a.m.

Another Present Under the Tree

Now that’s REALLY posting the cat.