Quote o’ the Day

Here’s two:
“My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.” – Jack Nicholson

“According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in  front of men than  they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.”    – Robert De Niro

🙂

Smart Kittens

President Bush and his aides are taking a stroll when they come upon a little girl carrying a basket with a blanket over it.

Curious, Bush asks the girl, “What’s in the basket?” “New baby kittens,” she replies and lifts the blanket to show him.

“How nice,” says Bush. “What kind are they?”

“Republicans,” the little girl says. Bush chuckles, pats the little girl on the head, and continues on.

Three weeks later, the president is taking another stroll, this time with Karl Rove. They see the little girl again with the same basket. “Watch this, Karl,” Bush tells him. “It’s really cute.”

He greets the little girl and asks “How are the kittens doing?”

“Fine,” she says. Then, with his trademark smirk, he nudges Rove with his elbow while asking, “And can you tell us what kind of kittens they are?”

“Democrats,” she cheerfully replies.

Rove is horrified! “But three weeks ago you said they were Republicans!” a shocked Bush says.

“I know,” the little girl replies, “but now their eyes are open.”

Kingdom of Loathing

Here’s a typical thing that happens when you Adventure in KoL.
A guy walks up to you at a bar…Len Scrafters, Opthamologist

As you enter the Typical Tavern, you are approached by a strange, strangely-strange-looking stranger.

“Hello, stranger.” he says. “Allow me to introduce myself. I am Len. Len Scrafters. I made these for you, despite the fact that I’ve never met you before. Isn’t that strange?”

Yep. Pretty strange. You acquire an item:

beer lens

You acquire an item: beer lens

Adventure again (The Typical Tavern)

Go back to The Distant Woods

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This is the first time I’ve ever played any sort of online game, RPG or otherwise.  I find that rather amazing, considering how much time I spend at the computer.  Once, a million years ago, I got good at Prince of Persia, back when it played on Win 3.1 I think, or possibly 98.  But that wasn’t online.

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Here’s another one:
Haiku Dungeon Insanity

You’re feeling moxious
You strip down and start streaking
through the catacombs

You gain 2 Sarcasm.

Adventure again (The Haiku Dungeon)

Go back to The Dungeon Full of Dungeons

What I Did On My Summer, er Christmas, Vacation

Dammit, I had this all written, and I went to post it, and the db server crashed and burned and I lost the whole story. Serves me right, actually, for doing a real [long] post while I was testing the upgrade to my blog.

So .. I’ll retype, but it’s not going to be as funny. Never is, the second time around.
Over Christmas, we did all the things that most middle America types do for the holidays – visited with family, ate too much, drank too much (or not enough) and generally got fatter. That is neither here nor there for the purposes of my story, but I keep reading what everybody else did over the holidays and had to put in my 2 cents worth.

The best thing that happened over the vacation started with my neighbor’s internet access going down. She is hooked (if you can call a wireless connection “hooked”) into our secure router. I am her techie, because I do computers and she is older than dirt. She decided she needed to do something nice for us, so she made us a punkin pie.

Where I’m from, punkin pie cannot be et without whipped cream, so I went to the store and bought a couple of those squirty-type cans. Mmmm. Love that stuff, don’t need any pie with it, either. This was the real thing, actual whipped cream in a can.

I was in the kitchen, and the dogs were in there, too, watching me in case I dropped anything. I opened the new can of whipped cream and shot some into my mouth. Sissy was watching the process intently. I let her smell the can, and when she went to lick it (but before she actually made contact), I started squirting the cream directly into her mouth. She took it like a trooper, loud noise and instant volume and all, and came back for more. The little dog did the same thing. Watching them eat whipped cream directly from a can was very entertaining for me. [I don’t get out much, can you tell?]

The upshot of all this is that Sissy immediately keyed into the whole process and will open her mouth right up for it now if I show her the can. Ha. And who sez my dogs aren’t well trained??

test

test post, last one failed, and after I’d written the most exciting paragraphs of my life!