.
I wonder where the birdies is?

That would be my ATF ode to spring. I’m easy that way.

So, driving up our little street with the windows down, finally, I’m hit with the wonderfully overpowering smell of orange blossoms. Oh, heaven! Is there anything better in nature? Besides lilacs, stargazer lilies and iris, I mean.
Everyone on our little block has at least one orange tree in their front yard so it smells divine this time of year. Everyone, that is, except us, we have hideous ornamental plums and pears, which are as messy as a flock of crows. They are gross.

One interesting thing to note: the pears, when they bloom, smell like cum/spooge/ejaculate whatever you call it. Really. You walk out the front door for a few days each spring and start looking for copulating males. That’s pretty much the only thing I like about those damned trees. They’re not really very pretty, the fruit is (naturally, as they are ornamental) completely inedible. They stick like superglued bird crap (or rotten fruit, which is what they are) to my car. Okay, one other good thing, they do attract birds.

I often wonder what Bob was thinking when he planted those ornamentals. The side yard has cherries, peaches, and nectarines, he did so well over there! And now an avocado which has grown [I am not making this up] six inches in three days. It was obviously waiting for a little sunshine.
I love fruit trees.

Fruit trees=good, handicapped ornamentals=not so much.

We pruned the old peach and nectarine too hard this winter, they’re not going to have much fruit this year. But it looked like it had been 5+ years since their last trim job, and branches were breaking. Whomever lives here next year [please, God, don’t let it be me*] will have a nice crop. When those peaches ripen up and you eat them warm off the tree it’s better than a lot of sex I’ve had. Not all, but a lot. Mmmm, juice dripping down the chin, so sweet and fragrant it makes your eyes water.

I’m sure glad it finally quit raining.

*[nice house, nice yard, city sucks major ass wind]