Unconscious Mutterings

I say … and you think … ?
First, you try it:

1. Video ::
2. Fantasy ::
3. Homework ::
4. Crush ::
5. Late ::
6. Husband ::
7. Soccer ::
8. Wine ::
9. Before ::
10. Romantic ::

Now I’ll do it:
I say … and you think … ?

1. Video ::tape
2. Fantasy ::Island [De plane! De plane!]
3. Homework :: crushing
4. Crush ::preteen
5. Late ::husband
6. Husband :: ex
7. Soccer ::fever
8. Wine ::kangaroo
9. Before ::after
10. Romantic ::dinner

Quote o’ the Day

“‘It is very pleasant dining with a bachelor,’ said Miss Matty, softly, as we settled ourselves in the counting-house. ‘I only hope it may not be improper; so many pleasant things are!’”

—ELIZABETH GASKELL, CRANFORD

Five-Word Newsflash

–==++ TopFive’s Five-Word Newsflash ++==–

Item: Georgia court bans gay marriage.

Comment: Marrying cousins, siblings still allowed.

(Jim Woodruff)

Quote o’ the Day

British politician Tony Benn proposed to his girlfriend, Caroline, while sitting on a park bench in Oxford in 1949. After she said yes, Benn was so carried away that he wrote to the city council, pleading to let him buy the bench. The council agreed, and Benn had it placed in the garden of his home in London as a reminder of that moment.

Top5

Pretty funny today. 🙂
July 10, 2006

NOTE FROM CHRIS:

Enron founder Ken Lay died last week of a massive
heart attack. In May, Lay was convicted on 10
counts of securities fraud and related charges,
and was expected to be given a lengthy prison
term at his sentencing later this year.

Would TopFive kick a man while he’s down? You betcha!

The Top 17 Ken Lay Epitaphs

17> Here lies Kennyboy, who’s not so well, for now he cooks his
books in Hell.

16> Here lie your retirement savings.

15> According to our accountants, my lifespan was supposed to be
2,461 years long.

14> Ask me about my eternal damnation!

13> In a few million years, I can be traded as a commodity.

12> Kenneth Lee Lay, 1942-2006. (See also 15 U.S.C. 78j(b),
78m(a), 78m(b)(2), and 78ff; and 18 U.S.C. 371, 1014, 1343,
1344, 1956(a)(1)(A)(1), 1956(a)(1)(B)(1), 1956(h), 2,
and 3551 et seq.)

11> Lay off!

10> Stiff, cold, rotten — and now dead!

9> Actually, I was shot by Dick Cheney.

8> Kindly remember that urinating on a grave is a Class A
misdemeanor.

7> Now *officially* worm shit.

6> You want justice? How’s this: Satan is doing me doggy-style
right now.

5> Wait… I had a heart?!?

4> Just like California, it’s lights out for me.

3> Ken Lay: *nobody’s* prison bitch!

2> Hey, how bad could a place with this many lawyers and
accountants be?

and Topfive.com’s Number 1 Ken Lay Epitaph…

1> … and I would’ve gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t
for those meddling stockholders!

[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2006 by Chris White ]

You, too, could get ALL the top fives delivered to your inbox. Don’t miss out! Subscribe today!
http://www.topfive.com

Quote o’ the Day

“On stage I make love to twenty-five thousand people; and then I go home alone.”

—SINGER JANIS JOPLIN

Poor Janis. Have you listened to her in the last few years? I didn’t appreciate her when I was younger, now I can hear her blues in every note. What a spectacular set of pipes! I’ve got to go find that movie, Festival Express, and watch it again.

News

Enron founder Kenneth Lay died early Wednesday in Aspen, Colo.,
of a massive heart attack while awaiting sentencing after being
found guilty of conspiracy and fraud in the Enron trial in May.
Lay’s death came as a shock to former Enron stockholders, some
of whom lost their entire life savings in the company’s collapse,
as they were convinced Lay did not actually *have* a heart.
(Mike Ranston)

–==++ TopFive’s Five-Word Newsflash ++==–

Item: Ken Lay dead at 64.

Comment: God’s portfolio held Enron shares.

(Bill Muse)