25 THOUGHTS TO GET YOU THROUGH ALMOST ANY CRISIS

1 – Indecision is the key to flexibility.
2 – You cannot tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
3 – There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
4 – Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
5 – Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
6 – Sometimes too much drink is not enough.
7 – The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
8 – The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
9 – Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world.
10 – Things are more like they are today than they ever have been before.
11 – Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
12 – Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
13 – Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
14 – I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
15 – Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism.
16 – All things being equal, fat people use more soap.
17 – If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
18 – One-seventh of your life is spent on Monday.
19 – By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
20 – Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
21 – The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.
22 – There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
23 – This is as bad as it can get, but don’t bet on it.
24 – Never wrestle with a pig: You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.
25 – The trouble with life is, you’re halfway through it before you realize it’s a ‘do it yourself’ thing.

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