–==++   TopFive’s News Headlines   ++==–

Olympic Torch Bearer Sets Fire to Tibetan Monk

Police Describe “Horrific Scene” at Hansel and Gretal Daycare

Gun Pried From Charlton Heston’s Cold, Dead Fingers

Fed Arranges for Bear Sterns to Marry, Divorce Paul McCartney

New Freudian Cookbook Features Mostly Banana/Melon Recipes

Credits: David Kass (1), Jerry L. Embry (2,5), Wiley (3),
Danny Gallagher (3), Stuart Johnson (3), Bill Muse (4)

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