These made me smile this morning. Probably have to be kind of geeky to appreciate them, however.
C L U B T O P 5
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July 2, 2008
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
Bill Gates has officially cleaned out his
desk and stepped down from his Microsoft gig.
It’s about time that nerd got a real job
and stopped mooching off his parents!
But seriously, folks…
The Top 15 Things Found in Bill Gates’s Desk
15> A frame holding the first $1 billion he made.
14> Those compromising pictures of Janet Reno that ultimately
saved Microsoft’s monopolistic bacon.
13> iPhone, iBook, Airbook, iPod, etc.
12> “Past Due” notices from Hell’s Souls Receivable Department.
11> A copy of “Home Haircuts for Dummies.”
10> $863,979.42 in loose change.
9> Crumpled copy of Al Gore’s patent on the Internet.
8> A copy of Machiavelli’s “The Prince,” an IOU from Pope
Benedict XVI, Jimmy Hoffa’s wristwatch and some Skittles.
7> God’s cell phone number.
6> Memo to Microsoft employees now allowing consumption of
apples and Big Macs.
5> His old cardboard “Will Compute for Food” sign.
4> Steve Jobs’s life force — and damn if it didn’t get out
of the bottle again!
3> The title deed to Liechtenstein.
2> Unsent letter to girl who spurned him in 10th grade, written
on back of bank statement.
and Topfive.com’s Number 1 Thing Found in Bill Gates’s Desk…
1> Severed limbs of the Microsoft product developer who wrote
the original specifications for Windows Vista.
[ Copyright 2008 by Chris White/TopFive.com ]