Gadgets we need

Via Top5

We need one for the radio, too, that will insert static at the sound of Rush Limbaugh’s voice.

September 15, 2011


Tired of Snooki? A Brooklyn man has come up with
a hack for a TV remote that automatically mutes
the TV when certain celebrity names are mentioned.

What other brilliant gadgets could we all benefit from?

The Top 17 Inventions We’d Like to See

17> Reality Enhancer: Glasses that let you add great effects
and coolness to your otherwise drab existence

16> Random excuse generator for White House press secretaries

15> Automated launcher that flings a shoe at the TV whenever
Nancy Grace is on, so that we don’t have to

14> Pants on Fire!: detector that makes all lies during
presidential debates sound like Donald Duck    [<–love this]

13> Organic and sustainable fake vomit

12> Foot-pedal powered Fleshlight so you can keep one hand on
the mouse and the other on the bong

11> Traffic lights in Washington D.C. that mirror the level
of gridlock in Congress to inspire more cooperation

10> A Roomba stapler that follows your cat around and staples
his ass shut every time he craps anywhere other than the
litter box

9> Solar-powered Electric Slide

8> George Hamilton Grill: human-size, dishwasher safe, non-stick
surface, coordinates with arc of the sun for even tanning

7> Chocolate meth

6> An app that will send 20 volts to your boss’s crotch when you
dial his/her smartphone

5> A GPS that finds the nearest exit whenever the chicken dance
is played at a wedding

4> Crackless sidewalks (many mothers these days don’t have
health insurance)

3> Smartphone app that auto-conferences your agent, manager,
lawyer and rehab center as soon as you are put in the back
of a patrol car (sold only in Hollywood)

2> Combination SCUBA tank/Nachos dispenser

and’s Number 1 Inventions We’d Like to See…

1> UFCUL8R: Whichever ultimate fighter is getting his ass kicked
worse on TV, his face is digitally replaced with that of
Piers Morgan, Kate Gosselin, Charlie Sheen and many more!

[ Copyright 2011 by Chris White/ ]

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